Praise the Lord for all the cash I've got
Praise him for my Rolls Royce and my yacht
Serving God ain't hard, with a credit card
Jesus died so I could make a lot...
Praise the Lord, he's made us millionaires
Wave your donations in the air
We've replaced our hymns with ATMs
And soon we'll charge a fee on every prayer...
Jesus Christ was a poor man, don'cha know
He should have used our accountants for his cash flow
Stuff the sermon on the mount, he should have had a bank account
2000 years with interest... He'd be rolling in the dough.....
Praise the Lord, this song is out on CD
Just $40.95 plus GST
Hallelujah, plenty of moulah
Solid gold baubles on my Christmas tree...
I've got all of heaven's riches!!!
Thanks to all you stupid bitches.
Praise the Lord for modern Christianity...
Whoever said religion should be free...
(The Chaser's War on Everything)
Showing posts with label Satirical Music. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Satirical Music. Show all posts
What Would Jesus Do? (Sexy, funny and offensive - the perfect Youtube)
Youtube blurb: A music video to watch while you skip church this Sunday. Written and performed by Julie Wittner (co-creator of "2 Hot Girls in the Shower") and Ryan Smith (a staff writer for "Mad TV"), and directed by Kim Evey (creator of "Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show"). This song started out as a live sketch at the ACME Comedy Theatre in L.A. If you like sharp, Daily Show type political satire, you'll enjoy this country-western music parody!
Saving My Hymen for Jesus
Found this over at Bligby and had to blog it.
Jo and Snakey... you're gonna love this!
"Keepin' the boys from away down there for the big boy up above"
Satire - Two girls dish about the benefits of saving it for the lord! Written by Katie Goodman & Soren Kisel. Staring Katie Goodman & Sallie Sills.
Creation Science 101 (musical parody)
Thanks Roy Zimmerman for posting at Ex-Christian.net
"Creation Science 101" is on my album "Faulty Intelligence" available on my website and on iTunes. -- Roy Zimmerman
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Eric Schwartz is a very funny guy. This is a cool Video and you must take it as pure satire and comedy. If you have any complaints about it or are offended, please leave a comment because any comment is a good comment.
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
Well I'm frickin' sick and tired
Of turning on the news
And seeing the religious right's
Ungodly fight to take our right to choose
When to bear our children
Who to love and how
Education and protection
If we're just practicing for now
So dubya look obey a book
If that's what works for you
But I don't tell you how to pray
So don't tell me how to screw
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
So you’re screaming bloody murder
'Bout the taliban regime
For subjugating women
And being too extreme
And basing legislation
On some ancient holy book
Does that sound a bit familiar?
Here's a mirror, have a look
And as for the ten commandments
They need one more at least
Thou shall never cover up
The acts of pervert priests
How'd they let that happen
Unless they just abhor us
Well anyway it adds
Another layer to the chorus
So you'll execute a person
And protect a single cell
But mercy-kill the terminally ill
And you're goin' straight to hell
I don't know much about
The word of God
Far be it from me
But I can tell you what it ain't
Hypochristianity
I am not anti-Christian
Before you grab a rope
There is beauty in religion
And joy and love and hope
We're all looking for an answer
Some colossal cosmic cause
But who the fuck are you
To turn your views into my laws?
It's just believers in the bible
That would have abortion banned
Anti-choice agnostics?
I could count’em on one hand
And as for killing babies
I have but one retort
If someone raped your daughter George
You'd beg her to abort
And if some young girl from your church
Shows up with child or some infection
‘Cuz you taught her what a horrid sin
It was to use protection
One day you'll face the pearly gates
And whatchu gonna say
When that long-haired Jewish peacenick
Sends your ass the other way sayin’
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
I've had it up to here
With all the biblibile you spew
Keep your Jesus off my penis
(at least that's what I would do)
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
That's if'n you want me to
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
Well I'm frickin' sick and tired
Of turning on the news
And seeing the religious right's
Ungodly fight to take our right to choose
When to bear our children
Who to love and how
Education and protection
If we're just practicing for now
So dubya look obey a book
If that's what works for you
But I don't tell you how to pray
So don't tell me how to screw
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
So you’re screaming bloody murder
'Bout the taliban regime
For subjugating women
And being too extreme
And basing legislation
On some ancient holy book
Does that sound a bit familiar?
Here's a mirror, have a look
And as for the ten commandments
They need one more at least
Thou shall never cover up
The acts of pervert priests
How'd they let that happen
Unless they just abhor us
Well anyway it adds
Another layer to the chorus
So you'll execute a person
And protect a single cell
But mercy-kill the terminally ill
And you're goin' straight to hell
I don't know much about
The word of God
Far be it from me
But I can tell you what it ain't
Hypochristianity
I am not anti-Christian
Before you grab a rope
There is beauty in religion
And joy and love and hope
We're all looking for an answer
Some colossal cosmic cause
But who the fuck are you
To turn your views into my laws?
It's just believers in the bible
That would have abortion banned
Anti-choice agnostics?
I could count’em on one hand
And as for killing babies
I have but one retort
If someone raped your daughter George
You'd beg her to abort
And if some young girl from your church
Shows up with child or some infection
‘Cuz you taught her what a horrid sin
It was to use protection
One day you'll face the pearly gates
And whatchu gonna say
When that long-haired Jewish peacenick
Sends your ass the other way sayin’
Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
I've had it up to here
With all the biblibile you spew
Keep your Jesus off my penis
(at least that's what I would do)
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
That's if'n you want me to
Jesus singing "I will survive".
Short video and very Very funny.
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